Journey!

We've all picked up a novel, flipped through a magazine, watched a video, or seen a picture that has spoken to us in mighty ways. It happened to me just a few weeks ago, delivered in a short book from someone I don't even know. Her gift spoke volumes within the first nine or so pages. No. Make that nine seconds.

The book is entitled "ten poems to change your life" by Roger Housden. Housden examines each poem and offers reflections with strong insight. It's a lovely read, though filled with some spiritual poetry to which I don't subscribe.  

However, one particular poem touched me because it describes my feelings about answering God's purpose for my life. It's "The Journey" by Mary Oliver.

     One day you finally knew

     what you had to do, and began,...

Twelve simple words speak to the very core of many souls. Including mine.

I remember being very still as I read the poem slowly, allowing the words to settle in. I never felt a sense of excitement that here it was AT LAST: A poem that captured the essence of what I'd been feeling for so long. Instead, it was a quiet "knowing". Knowing the words articulated my soul.

For most of my life, I thought I wanted to be a news anchor and reporter. And I was. I worked in cities small and large. It was sometimes heady. Sometimes not. I spent years riding the highs and lows of successes and disappointments, never feeling as though it was quite the right fit. Certainly never feeling as though I was doing what I was made to do.

Until one day, in a moment of clarity, my desire to be a servant more than surfaced, it exploded. My utter lack of desire to be in my profession nagged and rankled. The yearnings of my heart burst forth. And I realized, to be true to the person God desired, I would have to make a radical change.

     though the voices around you

     kept shouting

     their bad advice –

     though the whole house began to tremble

     and you felt the old tug

     at your ankles.

    "Mend my life!"

     each voice cried.

This journey would rock my world. It would cause family and friends to push back. It would yield a lot of questions, comparisons, gossip, judgment. I would feel vulnerable. Doubtful. My marriage would be shaken, challenged and ultimately, strengthened. My family – oh, the STRESS! This journey would test my trust in everything. In Him. It would take me to my knees. And still does.  

     But you didn't stop.

     You know what you had to do,

     though the wind pried 

     with its stiff fingers

     at the very foundations,

     though their melancholy

     was terrible.

     It was already late

     enough, and a wild night,

     and the road full of fallen

     branches and stones,

     but little by little,

This journey would refine my faith. It would reveal my SIN. My obedience. It would reveal God's great mercy, love and provision. Draw me closer to Him. It would lead me to the cross daily. For it became quite clear that stepping out of the boat results in experiencing God in a very profound way.

     as you left their voices behind,

     the stars began to burn, through the sheets of clouds,

     and there was a new voice,

     which you slowly

     recognized as your own,

     that kept you company

     as you strode deeper and deeper

     into the world,

     determined to do

     the only thing you could do–

     determined to save

     the only life that you could save.

This journey produced a contentment I'd never known, an understanding of what contentment really is! Because when the affirmation, the realization comes strong and fast, surging with power, it's impossible to walk way. Yes, the more you step into God's presence, the more sure your Spirit-led stride. For you realize this is what you were meant to do. He longs for it. Boldly take hold of all He offers, embrace and follow Him, radically.

And then extend His offer with gentle lovingkindness and conviction. For unlike in the poem, there's more than one life to be Saved.  

This journey is taking me from the comfort of life as I know it in Janesville, Wisconsin to the mission fields in Central & Eastern Europe, based in Budapest, Hungary. But it's not about me. It's about Him. 

So where's your journey taking you?