Recurring Dreams

Yep, I have them… and one of them has to do with being in prison.  Whenever I have a dream about this particular subject, I can always remember it vividly the morning after, and can usually derive some sort of meaning from it.

If you know me at all, you know my biggest fear is being locked up and confined in a small, dark room alone and with no way out.  In last night’s dream, I was being thrown into a prison for some reason.  Perhaps no reason at all… actually, I think there was a reason, but it didn’t have to do with me.   Anyway, I managed to escape, illegally, and took off.  Somewhere along the way I ran into my fiance and we started walking.  As we were walking past the prison, I suggested that we keep walking faster, but he suggested that I go in and face them or else they would just find me later.  So I did, and I found myself in an intense argument with this dark-haired woman.  I explained to her that I didn’t think human beings should be confined like that in small, dark cells–but she interrupted me by telling me to get back in, and that my cell was not small.  The remarkable thing was that in the dream, I wasn’t scared throughout this entire interaction–but when I woke up soon after, I felt terrified.

It was 3 am–I lay in my bed afraid to move because I was convinced that if I did, there was no way of telling what I would come in contact with.  So I lay still, so scared that something was going to grab hold of my feet and drag me off into a small, dark cell like in the dream.  I knew in my brain that the fear was irrational, but I couldn’t get myself to move, or even stretch out my feet for fear that they would be met by a cold, hard grip.  So I lay there for probably 10 minutes, just speaking Jesus’ name over and over again in a quiet, timid voice.  At some point, I had this Bible verse pop into my head:

He who is in you is greater than he who is in the world. -1 John 4:4

I’d never intentionally memorized the verse or anything like that–I don’t usually read 1 John.  Someone probably said the verse to me in conversation recently, but either way, it gave me a sense of peace.  I spoke it out loud because I know Satan will flee at the name of Jesus, and I was able to fall asleep soon after that.

It’s interesting, because I was just talking to someone yesterday about places in my life where I feel like I’m trapped with no way out.  They were praying over me for release and freedom from these strongholds–I’ve prayed for these things countless times in my life and have seen no progress.  It always seems like an endless cycle of me fleeing and Satan catching up with me.  The new dynamic that this whole experience gave to my faith is the idea that I can stand up to Satan’s attacks through the power of the Holy Spirit–but the thing is, I have to stand up and face it.  As powerful as prayer is, the method God chose to get rid of the evil one for us is to have us speak truth at Satan in Jesus’ name.  This means we have to stand up and speak–and God provides the power behind it.  We can’t just ignore Satan’s attacks and pray that God will keep him away–we have to face him, realizing that we’ve been given the power to do so!

Jesus spoke to Satan in this way while tempted in the desert.  He is our model–who we should try to imitate.  So… that includes standing up and facing it without fear and full of faith.